Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Another piece of the journey

I had a very busy day today. I started back to work as the RE Assistant/Admin. at church (did I mention this? I'm fried this week). So today, I worked mid-day so I could have my meeting with the NERSCC person from my district - the final reference I needed to move from Applicant to Aspirant.

I was a nervous wreck all morning, but was so busy at work that I didn't have time to think about it. When I went in to meet with him, I felt like everything I was saying was stupid, trite, and perhaps mentally ill. Thankfully, I must not have seemed as mentally ill as I was feeling, and I somehow managed to convey the overwhelming desire that my spirit as to serve, because I got some really great feedback about my upcoming seminary years (that Iwish I could put into practice more) and he didn't feel there were any flags, and he basically said, "You GO girl!"

So after being incredibly intimidated by him (a rare occurrence for me) for the first hour, the last half hour was really great and a much more authentic discussion (for me at least) about transformation and his sense of what was to come for me.

I have been feeling really stuck lately and not able to access much in the way of spiritual peace, and I have to say, that I got right back in the groove after this; I must have been way more anxious than I realized.

I ran to pick up the kids (my baby's first real day at a sitter, albeit my best friend!) and shoved them all in the car to go to Nana's for the next leg of the day (at 5 p.m. no less). We ran over there, ate dinner, and Tom and I drove back to church (geez, it really is feeling like home lately), to attend the first Starting Points class with co-minister Rev. Scott Tayler.

I knew that Tom wasn't all that enthused about going (to say the least), but he went. And it was way better than he thought it would be ;). It was really fun, and we did an exercise about where you are in your beliefs about religion that surprised me at one point, and also made me realized how much I have changed/transformed in the last 10 years.

It was really a great class, and I can't wait to go again next week! And the kids were good for Nana, and were jammied and ready to get in the car when I got back, so everyone is asleep now and I should be too.

On the way home, Emma (13) and I had a really great conversation about UUism and whether our faith was meeting her spiritual needs, and I see that I need to be helping her with her seeking and not just relying on RE. She might get involved with the Cabaret performance and wants to find a Buddhist study group to go to at church, or maybe visit the local Zen center. How exciting!

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